When I Grow Up, I Wanna Have Boobies

My daughter has the Pussycat Dolls song "When I Grow Up," on her MP3 which I use when I run. For a long time, I thought the words were: When I grow up, I wanna be a star, I wanna have fun, I wanna have boobies which makes no sense whatsoever. Then, after listening to my daughter sing it, I realized it was "groupies."

Oops!

Then I saw this YouTube video of Ellen DeGeneres commencement speech at Tulane and she too thought it was boobies so I'm in good company.

And, the commencement speech is quite good. Her basic premise being, "you're going to be okay."

I hope she's right.

Commencement speeches scare me because they point out not only the number of years I've been out of college but also the fact that I don't yet feel like I've grown up. What is it that I want to do? I love theater but can I continue stage managing and yet have time for my family? Is stage managing an end in and of itself? Shouldn't I be striving for something more? But what?

When I'm stage managing I make long lists of things I'm going to do when the show opens like: cook more, take piano lessons, learn to sing, run more, etc. And then the show opens and I don't do many if any of those things. Oh, but I did run Broad Street which is 10 miles so I did accomplish one goal.

But now what? It begs the question: What do I really want to do with my free time? And am I truly going to be okay? Hopefully, when I grow up, I'll find out...and I'll have boobies.